All of our children were planned...well for the most part. We tried for 2 years before getting pregnant with Venti....we then planned for Grande and he was born 27 months later. A couple of years later and Venti was 5 and Grande was 3 we decided we needed more space because at the time we were living in a 3 bedroom townhouse. It just so happened that it was the same time the land that my Grandfather owned was just starting to be developed and new homes were going to be built. My Dad had just gotten his Real Estate license and so he became the developer/real estate agent for these homes. He graciously gave both my sisters and myself a lot so that we could each build a home and all live in the same neighborhood!
So the process of building a house became a priority and well in the middle of all of this I found I was pregnant again! We had planned on having another child after we moved into our new house! Well it looked like our house warming gift was going to be Tall! He was due the day we were to move in. As it turned out, he arrived 2 days prior. When we moved into our house, there were still alot of things that weren't finished..including the heat! We had to put his bassinet beside the oven and leave the oven door open!
As the years went by, the 3 boys all had each other and were each others playmates. When they were at the ages 10, 8 and 6 we thought about maybe having another baby. I researched everything I could find on "how to conceive a girl"...I pretty much knew when I would ovulate and so I read that having sex a couple of days before ovulation sometimes resulted in a girl. So we tried this....and tried...and tried....and a year later and we still weren't pregnant! By then the kids were 11, 9 and 7 and I was soon approaching 35.
We decided to go away for a night that day in July 1999. Just the 2 of us.
We were still trying the "girl" way and I knew I was close to ovulating.
So we had sex that night (I know...TMI...sorry)...
And that next morning Joe wanted to make the most of having a night away, but I knew that I would probably be ovulating that day and I said, "no..we can't...we will have a boy"...
I wanted a daughter in the worst way...I have 2 sisters...all girl cousins....I am very close to my Mom and I wanted to have a daughter for every reason I could think of!
But I gave in....
Short was born 9 month later.
I knew at the exact moment he was conceived.
I didn't know with the other boys.
But I knew with Short.
2 weeks after that morning...the positive pregnancy test!
I was so excited.
At 20 weeks we had the ultrasound.
"Do you want to know the sex?"...the tech asked us.
"Yes, but put it in an envelope...we may or may not look at it"...
That's like being handed a wrapped present and never opening it!
The envelope sat on our kitchen table.
And it sat.
For about 4 hours.
I couldn't stand it any longer.
We sat together on the couch.
I told Joe to open it.
I couldn't look.
He opened it...I heard him chuckle.
Is he laughing because its another boy...or laughing because we are finally having a girl??
I feel the image brush again my arm as Joe nudges it to me.
I slowly look over at it.
I must have starred at that ultrasound picture 100 times...thinking maybe they were wrong...maybe that was the umbilical cord!
I thought that I'd never have that Mother/Daughter experience and it made me so sad.
I was sad for days.
And then it passed...I realized that God gave me boys for a reason...everyone is given what they are given for a reason. A mother of sons is what he wanted me to be...how lucky could I be? My sons could still go shopping with me....they could bake cookies with me....they could do everything a girl could do......and to think that I was sad...sad about the sex of our baby? Who does that? Look at all those that can't have children or have trouble conceiving and here I was sad that I was having another boy? I felt ashamed that I felt this way. I quickly wiped the tears away and eagerly awaited the birth of my 4th son. What a lucky girl I am and I didn't realize it. My boys have given me everything I've always wanted..and more.
This was taken 10 years ago...where did the time go?
Thank you God for giving me my 4 sons and forgive me for not realizing it sooner.
Monday, March 29, 2010
Labels: 4 sons, gender, Pregnant, sons. boys
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Girl I feel your pain, I mean joy! Ha! I want a little girl, but I'm afraid if we try we'll end up w/ 5 BOYS!!!ReplyDelete
What a wonderful good looking family you have. Sometimes we don't know how blessed we are. Anyway, I'm a new follower of yours and just wanted to stop by to see what was going on over there this week and found your moving story about wanting a girl. Thank you for it. Hey! You have cats! I love cats too. I'll be back to post again. I love family blogs.ReplyDelete
You are lucky to have boys. They are fun and from experince have found a little easier to raise. Not so much drama. Enjoy them.ReplyDelete
Yes I know I'm lucky...I LOVE my boys...just couldn't help wanting a daughter! Guess I'll have a house full of daughter-in-laws some day!! :) Thanks girls!!ReplyDelete
OH HOW I UNDERSTAND, BUT IN THE OPPOSITE GENDER KIND OF WAY!! hhaha SIX GIRLS! I read that book too! WE were supposed to go for as close to ovulation as possible. We tried until my hubby got sick of feeling controled by the ovulation schedule...thats all it took girl after girl.ReplyDelete
I hated crying after finding out it wasn't a boy, every time. I just wanted so much to see my hubby play with our son. My hubby was always fine with all girls. Now I just realize how blessed I am to have kids. I look at my beautiful family and wonder how I could feel sad, but you don't have to explain the feeling to me, I get it!!
Yesterday I walked into my house and saw a tall dark and handsome guy in the hallway. I said, "uhhh..." I was so confused. He is dating my step daughter and all of a sudden the next 30 years flashed in front of my face with son in laws, grandsons etc. If my step daughter has a baby at 20 like I did, I will be a 37 year old Grandma!!!! OK< I'm hitting the brakes. NO more worrying about boys ( that isn't to say that when I see a little boy that looks like my hubby, my heart doesn't skip a beat :)
Oh, and that ultrasound..I have never seen one like that! :)ReplyDelete
Hi Janae...ohhh I loved hearing your story because your on the opposite side with girls! It funny how you get what you get..and be ever so thankful for it!ReplyDelete
I too hated crying from hearing it was a boy. Sad for myself and for my hubby for him not to experience what its like to have a daughter...never being able to buy those beautiful Easter dresses and the little matching purses...
I too look at my family now and truly realize just how blessed I am. A mother of sons is what God wanted me to be!
Hopefully you won't become a 37 yr old Grandma! I'm hoping that won't happen to me for several years..lol.
My heart too skips a beat at times when I see a little girl and think..."she could be ours cause she looks like me"...and then I glance over at my son and smile at what a gift I have!
Which ultrasound? The first or second one?
I am surrounded by boys as well! I LOVE every minute of it! I only have 2 and we are finished but if we were to have more, I would be happy with more boys!!! Thanks for following my blog and now I am following yours!!! Look forward to get to know you better!!!ReplyDelete