Of course you're not. Still, the swim club is going to open and your kids are going to want to go, or vacation will creep upon you and you can't go swimsuit less!
First, DO buy a bathing suit. Wearing shorts and tee shirts at the pool all summer long just tells the world you've given up. I know they're expensive, and I know a good one is hard to find, but wearing a suit lets us know that you're still in the game!
IGNORE all those body-type terms: the "Triangle," the "Figure Eight," etc. You have enough labels already: Mother, Daughter, Cook, Maid, Last-Minute Key Finder, Dog-Walker, Vacation Planner, Therapist.....you don't need another limiting label in your head.
I'll tell you your body type:
- Not Perfect.
- Cover what needs to be covered.
- Support what is sagging.
- Pick a color you like!
DON'T try to save money. Buy whatever looks good. I don't care if it's $95. It's an investment. You can scrimp in other areas ... like your kids' bathing suits! You don't need to worry about your squishy muffin top AND the price tag.
DO NOT take your husband shopping with you! Believe it or not, he thinks it's sexy to see you wriggle in and out of ill-fitting lycra. He would even hire a babysitter for this opportunity!
USE a self-tanning lotion. As my sister and I declared years ago: tan fat is better than white fat.
GET a darling straw hat or any kind of hat except a baseball cap or visor!! You will look confident and stylish, and viewers will be distracted from your thighs.
LEARN what looks good on you. I can tell by looking at a suit if it is right for me or not. Now I don't even have to go to the store. I just put the kids in bed, pour a big glass of wine and surf the web. Go for solid colors which are more slimming.
Don't get too depressed. It's summer, after all. Afternoon naps, margarita's, the laughter of children.
A tankini is a small price to pay!
See you poolside, baby.
I'll be the tan one wearing a hat.
I'm just mad that the same suit I had last year still fits me! I was SUPPOSED to have lost 40 lbs. so I could buy a new one! Grr.
ReplyDeleteThis is the BEST blog post! I loved every word. Thanks for the smile--now I am off to find a new suit!
ReplyDeleteI have the suits but I don't have a hat, I never get around to it but this year, having read your post, I simply MUST!
ReplyDeleteHAH! I had to laugh at the "tan fat is better than white fat...I say that all the time too!" LOL
ReplyDeleteWanted to let you know too that you have an Award on my blog! :)
Your Award
I LOVE the swimsuit I got, last year, I think. It's red, halter style, 1940's with rouching down the sides. I love it. It cost a BUNDLE though- it was like $100, but it is SO much more flattering than anything I've ever tried on in a store. I was scared to order it because it was so expensive and it was purchased online, but I am so glad I did!
ReplyDeleteThis isn't the exact suit, but it looks just like this: http://www.modcloth.com/store/ModCloth/Womens/Swimwear/Bathing+Beauty+One+Piece+in+Emerald
Hey, go run over to my blog and vote- I am playing a game! I did baby pictures for a couple whose wedding I shot a couple years ago and I'm having my blog-readers match up the baby to the right groom! LOL Come over and play!
Whups, I forgot the link. lol http://www.eheizerphotography.com
ReplyDelete